One alcoholic can keep 20 codependents busy.
A relapsing alcoholic is an untreated codependent.
If only other people would get their shit together, then I wouldn't have to (fill in blank) all the time.
It's not my fault. The devil made me do it.
Have you ever thought that if you could just stop indulging in your favorite sin (eating too much, drinking too much, smoking too much, raging too much) then your life would be perfect? Have you ever done it successfully?
Perhaps you have set your New Year's resolutions and made your lists. You have committed yourself to action and white-knuckled a solution. You have proven to yourself and the world that you can control this thing any time you want if you just put your mind to it.
Then why didn't it stick? Why do you go back when you so clearly look and feel better without being a slave to the daily cravings? Is it possible that you just don't want it bad enough? Or could it be true that willpower is not enough in some cases?
That's a complicated question with a not-so-complicated answer. Ready? Wait for it...it's coming.
Under the physical is the emotional. Beneath the emotional is the mental. Behind the mental is the spiritual.
Your recovery is only as good as your understanding of the problem.
If you focus on the problem, the problem increases. When you focus on the solution, the solution increases.
Today, journal about the times you've tried to quit (or watched someone you love try to quit their drug-of-choice) and review the ultimate outcome to your attempts.
Then ask yourself: What if I'm making it harder than it has to be?
Kim Halsey is a human resource professional and executive coach who helps people overcome life damaging habits, restore important relationships, and live their dreams without drama.
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