Everyone was born with built-in quieting reflexes. But not everyone was comforted or given the skills to self-soothe. We had to learn those from our primary caregivers.
Small children self soothe by sucking their thumb, or rocking, or having a favorite blanket. In a painful place, they cry themselves to sleep. Addiction is the adult version of throwing a tantrum and crying ourselves to sleep. We self-medicate instead of suck our thumb.
Here are a few things we might have experienced and learned:
Children learn what they live. You are no exception. Many of these things work today as adults. How often, though, do we deny ourselves the genuine comfort of a walk, a bath, a nap. Instead, are you someone who reaches for a 'pick-me-up' so you can keep going?
Today's Journal Suggestion:
When you feel unusually mad, sad, glad, or afraid, what do you do to calm yourself down?
What did your parents do for you to help?
What did you see your parents do for themselves when strong emotions came?
Kim Halsey is a human resource professional and executive coach who helps people overcome life damaging habits, restore important relationships, and live their dreams without drama.
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